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Beauty of Nature

Beauty of Nature

Friday, November 27, 2009

Something's wrong with the electronic appliances

You might not believe me but my handphone is behaving like crap, my laptop is jammed and it refuses to do anything for me, my mom's handphone is behaving like nuts and the television is getting mad at me because I keep on changing the channels... And this is the night before the Raya Aidiladha which is tomorrow.


Coincidence with the events occurring right now? I have no idea... God, what the heck just happened?

This is confusing...

Friday, November 20, 2009

Back in the Nest

Yeah...here I am, shivering in my coldest wonder how on earth am I suppose to earn extra money in this short period of time? Well, can't say I didn't think about this back in campus but it is quite impossible with all the schedule and things my mom has planned. GOD!! I really wanna earn my own money!!! I feel so horrible keep on using the government's 'money' that they 'loan' to moi(keep on talking British accent huh...?) *sigh* Days I've wondered to keep people around me happy while I, myself, am gloomy. I just recently discovered that if I'm in a bad mood, people around me especially my friends will avoid me. Woah! What am I? Do I have this 'aura' people can feel or they just see my face and say,"Run!!!!" Whenever I'm in the faculty just doing my own thing without a single friend beside me who doesn't want to be with me when I feel alone, people will constantly watch me without blinking. They really kinda piss me off but then again, life goes on. It doesn't hurt me but it does hurt my feelings.... a lot(I'll be lying to myself if I said 'a bit'). Ah well....

So, end of the first semester of my first year in UNIMAS huh? The exams are okay except for the computer thingy. I just don't get it. I know how to use the computer but I don't know the names of the stupid things inside it which have such complicated names and all. I dislike, hate, despise, loathe it!!!! Urgh!! This rainy weather really make me go on like this....hehe.. That's why I love rainy days. 0_o

Here I am, at home, playing piano; watching National Geographic, Disney, HBO, Cinemax, Star Movies, Discovery Channel, Cartoon Network, MTV, V Channel; helping mom around the house especially in cooking(bizarre really...I kinda have this conscious mind that it's time for me to learn how to cook at last); reading books and comics; watching Japanese animation cartooons; playing computer games; listening to music; downloading Japanese manga and music legally; buying airline tickets online for some occasions for the holiday; updating my blog, Facebook....et cetera. Why am I babbling so much? Pah!

I guess that's all about now. I have to practise Ballade Pour Adeline since my mom loves to hear me playing it so much. I rather enjoy playing music to someone rather to my own enjoyment because that means I'm lonely and I hate being alone but people in UNIMAS don't even care about it really or is it my own negative thinking about it. Still, it's true.... How lonely I was back in KMPk. I guess I've made some progress in UNIMAS to get rid of this darn loneliness.... I'm digressing again... If you are clever enough, you will notice how digressing I am. I can't stick to one topic alone as I will open another topic regarding to the usual topic but have some connectivity to it.... you know what I mean? No? Well, that's alright. I don't think people will usually care enough to read my blog and care what I think. Nyahaha! You know what I said is true as there are no comments for my blog. People will usually comment at the shout box at the right of your screen right now.

I think I'm pretty bored if I can type this much. Yeah, that's right. I'm bored...

Maybe I should go to e-ruai zoology now... TTFN(Tata For Now)

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Busying in Campus

Oh God, I can't believe how ignorant I am in updating my own blog. Probably of the limited internet connectivity around this campus. Sheesh...

Anyway, I'm having my final exam now. I still have 2 papers left which are Biodiversity and General Chemistry. Truthfully speaking, there are so many things have been happening that I lost track of time. The Hari Raya, The EBX Jualan Day, The Home Concert 3...

Hari Raya Aidilfitri
-Same old, same old except no father to celebrate together with. I still miss him so much.

The EBX Jualan Day
-Yeah...one of my generic courses, the EBX0032, Asas Pembudayaan Keusahawanan. My professor said that we need the basic of business as it might come in handy when you graduate. Truth to be told, I think he's right. It's not like I can straight away working with the conservation section or whatever concerns with zoology...probably can be done but the main thing here, you might not like what you have to work for and have some interests in business is good enough to let you live in this world. Yeah, that rainy day... Keep on promoting own stall like mad. Free this, discount that...less here, less there... It's good, fresh, hot... Nonsense all pouring out at the same time. Psycho... Anyway, my group UNTUNG. Ngehehe..

Home Concert 3
-Believe it or not, the lecturer from the Faculty of Applied Creative and Arts asked me to perform for their Home Concert last month. What the...? I'm from the Faculty of Resource Science and Techonology. I don't have time to play around. Since even the president wanted me to perform...I guess I have no choice. I still love performing. I can't deny that. So, the practice went on until the day arrives. Ngehehe... As a pianist and a keyboardist, I can't tell you how bothersome to look at the conductor and the music sheet at the same time but still it's the learning process of becoming a music performer and I love it. I can't fool my own heart how much I love music...

And now, the final examination. Aiyark!! Oh! Waste not a minute, no more. I still need to review some chapters in biodiversity. I'll update my blog ASAP....if I cam make it. I will.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Convocation Day

Yeah, you might wanna know what's up with the convocation day and me, right? I've just started studying, then suddenly convocation day..
Huhuhuhu...

As you all know(or don't know), I've joined the UNIMAS Orchestra and we will perform performances during the 2-day Convocation Day this weekends. I'll be playing piano. The songs are Stand by Me and Semerah Padi. The practice will be an everyday practice in the evening which is very tiring cuz after class, must go and practice piano like some kind of mad person. The instructor expects more than what we have given. I guess it's alright but the less-than-a-month practice is not a very good thing cuz we do not have enough time to prepare ourselves 100%. Crazy.. Less than a month, I tell you... Sheeesh..

Anyway, it's just around the corner and we have to give our very best in this. We will perform too many songs this weekends and I just don't know how we're going to do it but we will do it. Let's hope we don't mess this performance....

Probably..

I guess I've updated this very much. Not much too say since I've been very busy all week plus I have to find these 20 specimens to be put into a jar containing ethanol and the assignments of other classes as well. *drop dead*

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

The Awesome Life in UNIMAS

Hello guyzz... I am so sorry for not updating this blog for like ages and I know Kishi really wishes to kill me right now for not updating this..huhuhu...

Well, after the orientation for about a week at Allamanda College, it's time to go and learn something new at the faculty. As you all know, I take Zoology course under the Zoology Department at the Faculty of Resource Science and Technology. Quite a few students in this course. About 47 of us here. There's also an orientation for us 1st years for Zoology course. We went to the Matang Wildlife Centre for 3 days and 2 nights camping there. Creepy place during nightfall... Lots of fun there, watching beautiful sceneries and all. On the 1st day, we had theis 'Burung Pungguk' game which is a game that we have to blindfold ourselves and follow the leader's voice. There will be people around us trying to distract us by making a lot of noise and voices altogether. Quite an annoying game, really...

The 2nd day, we went for jungle-trekking. We were travelling to this amazing waterfall which is about 2km from our campsite. Ugh...leeches everywhere. Lucky for me those leeches were unable to suck blood out of me. After the jungle-trekking, we went to the place where they captivate animals. Orang-utans, gibbons, leopards and so on. Then, we have some activities during the night. We had to capture birds, bats, frogs and insects to study them. The bats were just too cute. Birds must be really smart cuz we're unable to catch one except for the other group which caught one but 'terlepas' the birdy. Really want to 'pancung' that person's head off.
The 3rd day, barbecue time!!! There were activities in the morning and barbecue and it was time to go back to UNIMAS. It was such an awesome orientation. After the orientation, everybody is very friendly towards each other and by the time I realize, we are like a family now.

After the orientation, there are still things to learn and study, activities to do and such. I join the UNIMAS Orchestra(play the piano), BAYU(Badan Budaya UNIMAS) Gamelan and KEKAL(Kelab Kebudayaan Allamanda). Yeah, I know. All of the above are Arts related clubs. I love arts as much as I love science. I want to balance the usage of the left and right brain. It's very important, you know.

UNIMAS is quite huge and as it is very near to Kuching, every weekend(if I get the chance), I will drive to Kuching along with my friends. Yes, I do drive and I'm the driver...not them. They have no guts to drive a car as small as Kancil or Kelisa to as far as Kuching. Huhuhu... I do not complain about this. I love driving...especially auto cars. Hahahahahahahaha!!! Psycho....

Although it's rather tiring but I can learn so much from my seniors and professors and I enjoy this everyday with my friends.

That's it for now. I'll update this blog soon with more recent news although I cannot promise you.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

My University Life Is Getting Nearer...

I was a happy young teenage girl, just came back from KL having a blast time with my family and friends there, watching movies and such...

One week later...

Ain: Ugh, my university entry result is today...(no mood)
Mama: Really!!??(too eccentric about this)

TAHNIAH!!
Anda telah ditawarkan ke Universiti Malaysia Sarawak.

Jurusan: Sains dan Pengurusan Sumber Haiwan
Fakulti: Fakulti Sains dan Teknologi Sumber

Ain: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!
Farah: Aphal lu terpekik ni? Gila ka? *looking at my laptop screen*
Ain: MAMAAAAAAAAAAA!! Ain dapat pergi UNIMAAAAAAAAAS!!!!
Mama: Ye? Alhamdulillah... At least Ain dapat pergi daripada tak dapat langsung.

FYI, I did applied for UNIMAS...for the 4th option. Anyway, I'm glad I got into one. I'm so grateful to God.... Oh God...

I need to register my so-called Kolej Kediaman on 27-28th of June. Next week... Oh No!!!

Rushing here, rushing there!!! Medical check-ups!! Bank Islam!! Fee payment!! Photocopies!!! Signatures!!! Printings!!! Calls!!!! ETC...!!!

X_X Ugh....not good for my brain. After all those mumbo-jumbos, everything was cleared and now I'm ready to go to Sarawak although I'm gonna miss everything here.. wuwuwuwuwuwu...

Wish me luck!! I'm off to study animals....

P.S. Zoology is a study of animals' behaviours, structures, functions, evolutions and so on.

XD XD XD XD (Ain is apparently excited about this)

Saturday, May 23, 2009

PC Games Througout My Life

You know something, I think I'm addicted to PC games. No... I AM addicted to PC games. Who doesn't? Since I've nothing else to do apart of helping my mom with house chores, playing video games has been the #2 'duty' at home. I'm so bored I feel like screaming my head off. This is the 2nd time I've wished that I'm in university doing something that will make me busy to get it done or something. I love getting myself busy, if not.... Prepare the ear plugs. I'm gonna SCREAM!! I hate not doing something. Anything to make me occupied. I've been playing Nancy Drew Detective PC games for days now. For years I've been playing this game actually. My sister started it first somewhere in 2001 or 2002. She bought Nancy Drew in the Final Scene. Game #5. This game has many 'episodes' or something like that. Then we bought many others for the past years. I've played...

#3: The Message in the Haunted Mansion
#5: The Final Scene
#6: Secret of the Scarlet Hand
#7: Ghost Dogs of Moon Lake
#8: The Haunted Carousel
#9: Danger on Deception Island
#11: Curse of Blackmoor Manor
#12: The Secret of the Old Clock
#14: Danger by Design
#15: The Creature of Kapu Cave
#16: The White Wolf of Icicle Creek

I've cracked the case of 'The White Wolf of Icicle Creek' yesterday. Now I'm off to buy Case #17: Legend of the Crystal Skull. I can't seem to find the other missing cases. Downloading them is such a waste of time. Buying them for 'cheap'...ehem..is considered worthy.

Yahoo! Games are nice to play too. I, especially, love playing Diner Dash, Wedding Dash, Cooking Dash, Fashion Dash, Sally's Salon, Sally's Spa and so on. All this need to be faster-don't-make-the-customers-angry games are nice. I need to find another 'Dash' games, if available at that game store.

In spite of playing these games, I also love playing action games meaning like the Harry Potter games. Quite nice although it is quite scary. Yeah, go on and laugh. I kinda dislike games like Warcraft and such although I know how to play them. Keep on losing those games...one of the factors of me disliking them.

Games that can make my brain active throughout the day is fun. Like the Bejeweled 2 or Bejeweled Twist or match-the-same-colours-in-threes-and-score games. Hey, sometimes those games get my eyes and mind bamboozled. Similar to the find-the-hidden-things-in-this-room games. Really make me sick. The things are just too hard to find but I like playing them. The plot of the games are nice....one of the factors me liking them.

About the Nancy Drew games, you will get addicted to them when you're started playing them. Very cool! You're going to be Nancy Drew and investigating the place like a real detective. Oh yeah! Hardy Boys games are also out but I haven't buy them yet. I will, one day. From the same company. HER Interactive. You won't be bored playing them, I assure you.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Things Happened Recently

Hello!!

I just wanna apologize for not updating my blog. I was feeling a bit sad lately. Yeah, well, things happened you know. Anyway...

About 2 days ago, somebody broke into our house. Yeah! The 'person' took away 2 handphones and RM155. I think it's kinda weird really cuz the robber didn't take any of the jewelleries. Heh! He/She(not weird nowadays) must have came in through the window.

I just got my result back. You wanna know? It's not hurt to let you guys know. It is the past anyway. The past creates the future. I got an 'A' in English, a 'B+' in Science Mathematics, a 'B' in Biology and a'B-' in Chemistry. I always weak in Chemistry. I've tried my hardest in achieving good result in Chemistry and you know what, I did. A 'B-' in Chemistry. I was like,"Wow...all my hard work has paid off." I usually fail in Chemistry. It's not a bad result but I didn't get CGPA 3.0 and above. I aimed that but I didn't get it. God has plans for all of us including me. Everything has reasons for the things that just happened. The only thing we need to do is think and act. Rationally, of course.

Deciding which course of study and university I'm going to is quite a challenge. I want to do things people don't usually do or go for. I want to take some risks. Taking risks on the safe side, at least. I applied for Perubatan Veterinar in UMK, Microbilogy in UKM and (like I said, on the safe side) English Study in UKM. I don't know the result of this....*sigh*. Wish me luck!

Oh yeah, just now when I logged into my page in Facebook somebody sent me a message. I was like,"Ok, who is it?" You know what, it's Rob Costlow!! The famous musician! You probably don't know him but I do. He composes music for piano and they're just brilliant. I downloaded his music. Very nice, I tell you. Full of energy and emotions. I just can't describe it. His music is wonderful!


Friday, May 1, 2009

Long time ago....yeah, right...

Hello everybody!!! I'm being sarcastic for no reason and it's not even funny. -_-'

What shall I tell you guys? Oh yeah!! You see when you're moving to somewhere else there are many stuff you need to pack, right? I just discovered my old diary when I was 7 years old. So, I like...WOW!! I don't even remember what things I wrote in it. So, read this....

Saya akan bercerita tentang saya rajin. Pada suatu tengah hari saya pergi sekolah. Saya sudah pergi sekolah dengan kawan saya. Nama dia Nabilah. Saya rehat dengan kawan saya 3 minggu sehari. Saya dengan kawan saya sungguh gembira. Saya dengan kawan saya selalu bermain dengan Ketiswary dan Fathiah. Saya sungguh gembira dapat kawan bersama. Pada suatu hari ada kawan saya bernama Karliye, Shahida dan Azreeza. Itulah kawan saya. Saya pun main dengan adik saya bernama Farah. Saya pun gembira dapat nombor 3. Saya pun gembira mendapat kawa-kawan yang baik.
Sekian, terima kasih.

Ok, that was me when I was 7. This one is my sister's when she was 5. Read...

Pada hari itu saya melawat ke Muzium Pekan dan pergi ke padang polo pekan lepas tu kita melawat dan menegok di Pantai Sepat, Pekan. disitu kami makan berehat makan angin, adakan pernah melawat di sana di Pekan Kuantan? lepas melawat kami pun balik pada pukul 1 tgh.

Everything that I just typed is exactly the same from the diary. Well, I remember that I disliked writing into diaries cuz my sisters love rummaging my stuff and read my diary without permission. Such rude sisters. Oh well. I still dislike writing into one. So, you can guess that I don't have a diary so how do I keep all my histories from the past till now? Pictures worth a thousand words.


I read and laugh till tears came into my eyes. So, this is ME and my sister when we were young..


Tuesday, April 28, 2009

A Paranormal Day For Me

I have no idea that today is going to be the creepiest and the most astounding day of my life. You will know soon enough after you read this...

Once upon an evening, my mum said that she wants to go to this ustaz's house to 'cure' my sister. My sister, well, she has been sick for almost a year since Dad died. My father death was not because of the severe disease. He died thanks to the black magic. I don't know who did it but that was just cruel. I remembered my father's face, his appearance on the day he died. I remember it so well sometimes I will cry unconsciously... After he passed away, this 'black magic' that consumed him till his death day got to us. My mother went 'berubat' after that along with my younger sisters. I, however, was not affected. I remember once when I was going to a mini mart following my auntie to buy some things. Suddenly, I felt so cold and an extreme dizziness overwhelmed in a short period of time. I fainted and I regained my consciousness when someone poured water on my face. The lady that owns the mini mart said that I was near to death. I was pale and weak and my whole body felt so strange that I can't seem to understand why these things happening to me. Blood could not be seen on my face as well as my hands and arms and legs. I don't know if this is the work of the black magic.

Well, that was the story of me. Back to my sister. Now, after Asar, we went to the ustaz's house by car. His house is somewhere in Wakaf Bharu. After we reached our destination, ustaz asked my sister to sit in front of him with her back facing him. After seems like hours(actually not), my sister cried so hard I felt like crying too(it's true..I'm soft-hearted) but I did not. My poor sister. So, this is the situation of her getting her 'medication' while I was away in college, I said to myself. Her cry pierced through my heart until I can't bear it. She was trampling all over and I knew that very second that she felt the excruciating pain within her. I held her and told her to calm down and be patient. I told her recite 'dua kalimah syahadah' and every doa she can. She did but.... I guess she was in such a pain that prevent her from doing it. It was very heartbreaking to see the state of my younger sister which is 2 years younger than me. She was crying her heart out and she was sweating so much. After about an hour, it was over. Her body shaken. She was so weak and tired after all she has been going through. After that, we went to my grandmother's sister's house. I was sitting beside my sister in the living room when the slide door of the balcony just at the right of where my sister sat began to rattle. My first thought was maybe a cat outside or the lizard or maybe the wind. Suddenly, the door of a bedroom just the opposite of us opened and you know what, the room was empty. Nobody was inside. Then, the sliding door began to rattle again. More furiously. What the heck? My sister looked horrified and ran straight to the kitchen where my mother, her friend and my grandmother's sister were. I followed her from behind. Obviously, I was horrified of what I've just seen with my own eyes although just the rattling and the opening of door. Sheesh!! STOP PICKING ON MY SISTER, if I can shout and give 'these things' a knuckle sandwich. The reality is I can't. One thing for sure, I have to support my sisters and my mother from these things, if I can. You know what, I will.

The Superoot Chocolate and Biology Lecturer

You know, I was just thinking about my Biology lecturer at Perak Matriculation College. It was so funny maybe because I was there. It might not sound funny here... Hmm.. Read the rest if you want to.

Another ordinary day for us, students, going to the lecture halls, to the tutorial rooms, library, science laboratories, student centre and such. For me, I was busy heading towards the largest lecture hall among the other 5 lecture halls, Lecture Hall 5. There I was, going to my usual seat, saying hello to the familiar faces there and waiting for En. Reduan, the Biology lecturer. This happened during the afternoon. So, here we go...

En Reduan: Assalamualaikum and Good Afternoon, my boys and girls.
Students(some are giggling, obviously not boys): Waalaikumussalam and Good Afternoon, sir.
En Reduan: Have you had your lunch, boys and girls?
Students: Yes!! (and No!)
En Reduan: Yes? Very good. No? Why? Diet? I have taken my lunch too. I drank this Superoot Chocolate for my lunch. I don't really like drinking this Superoot Chocolate but why I drank it, you might ask? Right? Well, it goes back way last week when I went shopping at this supermarket. I want to buy something else but then I saw this promotion of Superoot Chocolate. Buy One, Free One Umbrella.

When we heard what he just said, we laughed like mad. The way he said it.... XD
Then...

En Reduan: Ok what? It's raining season right now. If it's evening, it's raining and if it's raining, it's evening...right or not? Right, right? Ok...let us go back to Kingdom Animalia, Phylum Echinodermata.

And that's the end of it. Not that funny, right? Why am I even bother to type this....?

Maybe because I'm bored, I guess...Huhuhuhu...

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Feelings of Life

I can't believe I've finished my matriculation level for the thousandth time this month. I really miss Perak Matriculation College. I can't believe I'm missing it. I remember that when I just entered the college, I was feeling disgusted and hatred. I hated for being in this college and I hated for being forced to enter this college. I asked myself, why am I to do in this college? I've promised myself not to involve with chemistry and biology and all those science subjects. It must have been fate for me to do this all over again starting with the basics that I have learned when I was in secondary level. *sigh* In the first semester, I was pretty lonely myself. I did not even care about my classmates or the homeworks and all. All I know was I have to be patient until everything is over. I did not even care about my roommates much. It was 5 months after Dad passed away. I guess my emotions at that time was unstable. That's not the worst of it. I remember my first time went into this PLKN Pasir Puteh, Kelantan. I was NOT happy. Not the least bit happy. At all. My emotions were very very unstable that I felt like I had to kill each and every one of these stupid people in this camp so that I felt relieved. Of course, that was just the feeling. Not the real thing. Although, I did feel like doing it. People did not even feel anything about me having no father to support the family and as the eldest, I have to help my family. I was in a critical state. I did not even care what the teachers in the camp were trying to do. I did not even care whether I had to wake up every morning at 5 and so on. I did not care about the people, the food, the activities, the amazing views of the sea in the morning, in the evening and such. When I remember all this, I now know that I was still shocked with my father's death. I did not know what to do at that time. I told myself to endure all this until it's over. Then, I realised if I kept on ignoring all these things I might missed something important in life. My dormmates tried to ignore me. The other trainees from other dorms were quite mad at me. My guess for these actions of these people was that they tried to befriend me but I was too sad to even try to talk to them and all. Sometimes, I felt so annoyed and irritated with all these that I became like a lion that tried to eat its prey. I felt so mad, I yelled and ignored them. I was so lonely. I was very alone. Until now, I keep on asking to myself, why do I always have to go and meet my friends to feel happy? Why don't they come to me? Why do I always have to go to them? Why won't they come to me to talk to me? Why must I make the first move? Does this mean people look at me for the first time and think that I'm weird? Why won't they make the first move to say hello to me? Why must I go to them to say hello? If I don't go to them and say hello and will you be my friend and such, will they come to me or will they not? Will I be alone for the rest of my life? Sometimes, I try to think positively. Think on the bright side. After a month at that camp, I tried to change. I made many friends in such a short time with my new, positive attitude. I felt happy when people around me felt happy too but then I realized that was not the real me. I changed my attitude so that people will like me but I felt sad at the same time because that was no the real me. I felt like I'm being someone else. Then, I thought it's ok to be like this. What was so wrong to be positive? I should throw away my 'dark aura'. And I'm glad I did. That was the story of me in that PLKN Pasir Puteh. About the Perak Matriculation College....I was having problems in choosing which course should I take until this indecision was overwhelming I started to cry. Suddenly, I had a call from my mom saying that I was accepted into Kolej Matrikulasi Perak. I was like...really? Ok.. I had no feeling of entering to this college. I had to choose. Whether I want to enter a goverment-support college or a private one? With Dad gone, I had to choose properly and maturely. I entered Perak Matriculation College with a heavy heart. When the first semester exam was just around the corner, I realized that I had to do my best in these subjects although I disliked it. So, entering the 2nd semester and 2009. I told myself that I will do my best in Chemistry, Biology, Science Mathematics and English in order to know more about the world. And that is what I did in my 2nd semester. I learned like I've never learned before. I was eager to know more about science as time passes by. You know what, I fell in love with science not long after that. Learning them was quite interesting but to grasp their concepts were a challenge. I studied them. Study, doing experiments, study, doing more experiments, study.... I always want to know how other people study. Their study methods are very different from mine. Their methods are quite ordinary among the other students in the college. I was scared. Was my study methods wrong? Then, I found the answer to my question. It doesn't matter how we study as long as we know what we've been studying. For me, I study like I really am trying to study how things work and how do you get this and that. By doing this, it is easier for me to understand and grasp the concepts firmly. Day by day, at last the final exam!! I tried to calm myself and I did. not for my roommate. She kept on reading and doing practices until late at night. For me, doing practices is good but if you keep on doing it like some kind of routine istead of trying to uinderstand it, I don't think so. I've made an experiment about that. I've been doing so many practices and I did understand but after several days, I'll forget about it just like that. So, I thought to myself, what must be done to make me remember and understand them more effectively? Hehe.... Study them carefully. Memorise. Tell yourself you can do it. I have a memory card of 100 GB, tell yourself that. I did. I did everything to boost myself. My friends did not do anything for me. If it is concerned about my own self, I need to understand myself more and do something about myself. I motivate my own self to do things. I don't have motivation books or anything. I believe in myself and God, the most. I did everything at that time. Everything... Until I pressured myself, just for a day. Then, I told myself, enough is enough. Get a grip of yourself. You'll be fine. Since, I was a child, I always want to do things on my own without help from others. I feel like if I want help form them, they might feel troublesome or something. Furthermore, if I get their help they won't do as I told them to do. Sheesh!! It's much better if I do them by myself. I had problems in believing and trusting people once but not anymore. I'll look ahead and think about the future. I believe that God has His own reasons why I have to go through these obstacles and challages of life. One of them is to know about yourself. Knowing about yourself is like knowing God's creation. How delicate and amazing His creations are. One of them is us, humans. I want to know more about His creations. One of them is through studying about science.

Studying about myself, studying about something to believe.... Knowing about others, believing in people... Universally thinking, these are just incredible. I don't know why, you might think I'm such a naive kid, thinking something like this... the wheels keep on going and never stop. Just like time. It will never stop going forward. I will try my best in life. I will live my life to the fullest. The feelings of loss and all that I have been through and felt are of ways of God to make me learn about life. Life is journey. All of us will leave this world sooner or later. Which place do you choose to live is up to the good and bad you have been doing in this world.

But that is the story of the next life...

Friday, April 24, 2009

Curious of Life

My first time getting into this blog stuff....sure is. I have no idea people will actually love getting into this and now I know why. Sometimes, we need to update things about ourselves or things that we find interesting that we want to tell others about it or something else....et cetera day after day so that our friends will know what's going on in our everyday life. Quite interesting.... Those who love to isolate themselves from others, this is not a good thing or maybe they can lie to people about their life. Hehehe....sounds good to liars, right? I'm the lazy type of person to do this but still, I think it can be fun doing this once in a while. I've just finished my matriculation level. Next stop, university. Time flows and never stop. Keeps on ticking every second. Each second is precious like a long lost treasure. Have you ever wonder what you have been doing all this time? Using every second, every minute, every hour of your lives doing things but are you doing the right thing? You do so many things but is it worth it? I've just realized that we do not live forever. We will leave this world one day but we do not know when. Maybe I'll be gone after this, or tomorrow...who knows. God knows things we do not. That is why I want to treasure this life. Who doesn't? Doing charity and stuff. Do good to people. Do good to myself. If so, why are there people who throw away their life like some kind of garbage? You think by throwing away your lives, you can be alive again? I always wonder about things like this and wanting to ask them why?

You know, I always so curious about lives. One time, I asked myself, if I leave this world will people remember me? Cry for me? And such. Will they be missing me? Sometimes, I wonder if all of my precious family members are to die one day, what will I do? Curiosity kills the cat, as the proverb says, but without curiosity there will be no scientists, no technology and so on. I am one curious human being....